Monday, November 18, 2013

Journaling Drunk(ish)

I enjoy journaling.
I enjoy journaling after a night out.
Here are some drunken, tipsy and soberly regretful thoughts of Natalie over the last year or so.
And before you get all upset at me drinking, remember that 95% of the time, I'm the designated driver, I've never gotten black out drunk and the most I've ever drank in one night is 2.5 beers.
Most weekends I stay in and do old people activities like knitting, baking and drinking tea.
On the RARE occasion, I will go out and get a little tipsy.
I didn't even get drunk over Halloween weekend and I went to multiple parties.
I'm a goodie two shoes who enjoys the occasional beer and because I didn't do a DIY project this week and have nothing better to do with my time (except maybe finish reading that genetics chapter...), this is what you're getting.
Bearing all that in mind, also remember that these are entries that I started LAST YEAR. This is a full year's worth of rambles and most are from the same entry. 

Regrets:

"I'm going to regret the everything of life I have"

"I had one job. Climb the ladder. Could not climb latter. Attic room regrets."

"Every time I get drunk, I text people. I want them to know ridiculous things that are happening, but because I'm drunk and aren't wearing reading glasses, texts aren't texted very well. Why I can't just hold my phone a little closer to my face when out is beyond me."

"I should have all the regrets of everyone, but I don't have enough shame. I already too far gone in the having shame to have regrets of shamefulness."

Food:

"I want a grilled cheese"

"I wish I had pizza in possesion"

"It's two am. Two am taco time. Two am taco time in taco town is where I want to be. With taco and taquitos."

"Why does everyone want Taco Bell when they're drunk? I never want taco bell. I just want taco from another taco place that's not bell."

"I don't think I've ever been so happy to come home and remember that I baked a pie. I win at life. 
Even when drunk. Boo. YA."

"I want a chocolate. So. Much."

"If the world was good, there would be a pizza burrito in my hand right now. And I would eat it like a person eats a pizza burrito. With all the might of eating most delicious."

Being the life of the party:

"I got drunk before everyone else tonight. I went from regular loud person to voicecontroless veronica in one beer."

"Tonight, I stood in a corner and people watched for forever. It was fun until I realized how creepy I must have looked"

"I have a bean plant and the universe is impressed. It grew out of the drier and into my heart. Everyone loves it."

"I think people forget that I can't hear them when they talk over my head at a loud party, so half the time, I don't ever know who I'm talking to or what I'm talking about entirely. There's only so many times you can say "what?" before it become weird."

Boyfriend Priorities:

"Tonight, this girl told me she needed no more boys, but a man in her life. I must have a long way to go before marriage because at this point in my life, I just want someone who wears flannels and watches Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

On Being Forever Alone:

"There are reasons why being forever alone is my life always. Reasons are: can't shut up and control voice volume."

"Flirt with boy for a long time. Girlfriend walks in. I win at this game"

"Guys don't want weird girls because weird girls probably can't kiss very well and they don't know you're actually ok at that one."

"My flannel has become my significant other because it's with me at every party, keeps other boys away and holds me close when the drunk wears off and I get cold. But it lives in my closet. I don't want a boyfriend in the closet."



That's this weeks really intelligent and enlightening update.
Hope it was refreshing.

Love,

          Neffie



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